Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Strong mother and weak father

It is a mystery to me why so many ex-gay sites seem to think that gay men all have overbearing mothers and weak fathers. I suppose if it is twisted more than a little one could say that about my parents - it would be wrong. My mother was a strong woman who raised three sons and my father was a strong man who was involved with his children. In many ways my father looked more like a peacemaker than my mother. My mother was, in some ways, more involved with the church on the state and national levels, while my father was involved more with the local congregation. Yet they were both involved in many ways in the lives of their children. From my dad taking on the leadership for a Boy Scout troop - in part so their would be a troop for his sons to my mother teaching all of her sons how to cook, sew, iron and do laundry - so that they wouldn't be as helpless as her husband when they were living on their own. To both being at almost every event from school to music recitals to scouting to graduations and more; they were involved, supportive parents. They were partners in life and in the raising of their children.

And so on this day, the birthday of my father, I give thanks for both of them.

And I especially give thanks for the love my father had for my mother. Because of the evidence of that love I did not settle for marriage to a woman, even though I came close, since I just could not see the love between myself and the wonderful women who wanted to marry me. I just couldn't marry anyone without what my parents' had and so spared more than one woman the heartache of finding that the man she married was gay. And so I continue to give thanks for the love of those women and remain grateful for the care they have shown me.

No comments: